WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
