windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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