After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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