My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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