reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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