Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I have fence marks all over my body
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize