Christians are straight up FREAKS
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize