You're so nebulous sometimes
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize
