**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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