last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
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