; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
