you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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