i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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