There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
