Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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