yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
