It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
