you have to choose: penises or morals?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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