it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
dude. I can hear the air.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
