Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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