I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I'm bleeding and have questions
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize