I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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