No, you can still breathe under the balls.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
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