dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Randomize