It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Randomize
