Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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