Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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