Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
