Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
