Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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