i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
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