Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
