Me. At least after what I've been through.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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