Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
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