I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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