I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
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