Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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