Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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