How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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