Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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