He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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