afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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