ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
This house was built for laser tag.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize