it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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