I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Randomize
