My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize