What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
