he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
