if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
