When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
